2 Year Old Tantrums: 3 Reasons Why Your Toddler Loves Throwing Them!
2 year old tantrums are something that all parents are quite familiar with. Whether your child is the best behaved on the block or the biting, hitting toddler that everyone can hear coming from a mile around, all children will have a temper tantrum at some point in their life.
While this can be disheartening for parents who have read every book on the planet and pride themselves on knowing all the techniques for child rearing, it is perfectly normal for your 2 year old son or daughter to throw tantrums. . . and often.
Raising a 2 year old is hard business. It can be trying on the body and mind. Every parent knows that it can be difficult to handle raising a tiny tot whose temper seems to be worse than the Hulk! These terrible tantrums can make even the most patient mom or dad lose their cool, however, if you can first understand why 2 year old tantrums happen you can keep your wits a little more easily and even learn how to keep these tantrums at bay.
A tantrum first and foremost at this age isn’t about getting his way. It is however a direct result of the feelings that might have bubbled up because of it. So this means that your little boy or girl isn’t trying to drive you nuts on purpose. They simply cannot control their emotions at this point and these overwhelming and uncontrolled emotions can be quite scary for them.
The first thing that most people think of when they think of how to handle 2 year old tantrums is to walk away but this is actually the worst thing you can do. Tantrums are scary for your toddler and staying close by can help your child calm down sooner. Walking away only creates more uncertainty for your child. Your simple presence is reassuring to him and can make a major difference in helping him feel in control again soon. Some people even find that holding their child is helpful although this will anger some kids more.
Warding Off Tantrums
While you shouldn’t give in to every whim there are things you can do to help keep 2 year old tantrums at bay. The word “no” is a word that those who are 2 years old really don’t like. At this stage, your toddler is learning that he has an opinion and when you show him that his opinion counts you make him feel important.
Instead of always saying “no” think of ways you can say “yes”. “No you can’t have a cookie but you can have a sandwich or a banana. Which one would you like?” or “No you can’t watch TV at bedtime but you can have your special night light and a story.” Giving your child decisions shows him that his opinion and needs matter to you.
Another sure fire way to ward off 2 year old tantrums is to keep to a routine. While it can be very humdrum for parents, kids need routines to feel in control and secure. Try to stick to the same routine every day. Knowing what is going to happen next can be very comforting for your child not only keeping tantrums in check but also making bedtime easier.
While most 2 year old tantrums are perfectly normal and while they do occur often in some children, excessive tantrums, though usually totally natural, can be a sign of underlying issues. Sometimes it is as simple as something changing in the home. Perhaps you switched daycare providers, are expecting a new baby or are having issues with your spouse . . . all of these things can affect your child’s behavior. Always talk to your toddler to understand their positive state of emotion using language techniques like NLP.
Spending extra time with your child can help and so can setting boundaries in the home place. If you and your spouse are fighting and not fighting fair this can have a negative effect on your child – remember that kids often internalize problems. Yelling can be harmful to your child but working problems out civilly can actually be healthy.
There are other reasons that excessive tantrums may need addressing. While it’s rare, sometimes they can be a sign of underlying medical issues such as ADHD, anxiety and other related disorders. If you suspect a problem in your child be sure to consult his doctor. Usually it’s just for peace of mind but if there turns out to be an issue, be reassured that there is help, medication and moral support for anything you can imagine. It’s also possible that your child could be more cranky due to an ear infection or other common childhood illness.
When you understand your toddler and take time to care about his needs, 2 year old tantrums will not only become less frequent but also easier to handle when they do occur. When things are tough make sure to take good care of you too as a stressed out mommy almost always makes for a stressed out toddler. If you need support turn to those who have been there and lean on other moms to be your guide during these rough and tumble years . . . and in the meantime try to enjoy this year. It will go by far too fast!